Skateboarding

I have always liked skateboarding.  Heaps of my friends in middle school and high school skated... and my interest has continued to grow over the years.  If I were to go on the MTV show 'Made', I would definitely want to be made into a skateboarder... that or a hockey player.  I just think it's super cool to watch and I genuinely think pro skateboarders have some mad talent.  And I have always been really intrigued by how exactly people get the skateboard to work... and sort of stick to their feet... it's just nuts. 

However, I have always been too scared to actually try it out.

Well, the other day, I decided to finally take the plunge.

After I got back from a run (I am currently training for a 10k race), I noticed my 9 year old neighbor skateboarding in the driveway with a couple of his friends.  I asked them how it was going... and then proceeded to awkwardly (naturally) ask them if I could join.  They immediately started laughing.  I then spent the next 3-4 minutes trying to convince three nine year olds that they should let me try... "I am a quick learner", "I used to dance so I have good balance!", "I've always wanted to learn", "I know how to surf", etc...  FINALLY, my neighbor, Scott, handed me his board. 

He helped me get on an balance, but when he let go and I started to move, I jumped off.  They all told me to get back on and try again... so I did.  It started moving again and I felt pretty confident... for about one second... and then I freaked out... and FACE PLANTED. 

After this, you'd think I learned my lesson... but no.  I tried skateboarding with them for about ten more minutes.  I finally could stand (with getting help balancing) and roll quite a ways without falling or jumping off.  Next, after accomplishing this, was trying to scoot myself down the driveway and get on the board without anyone helping me.  I started going and going and then FACE PLANT #2.

In between the boys' hysterical laughter, I told them I'd have to come back another day.

Oh geez. 

Theme Party... and What NOT to Say...

Before I went on holiday to Australia, I went to an 80's aerobics theme party for a friend's birthday.  Her and her husband go to ReChurch and are super into themed parties, which is great because it has been a really great way to connect with people that they work with and are friends with outside the Christian circle.  I have gotten to know them pretty well over the past few months I have been in NZ and so when they invited me to the party, I was so pumped.  I love theme parties.

Well, someone at the party was wearing what Americans would call a 'fanny pack'... see below:

Well, don't ever tell any Kiwi, especially a male Kiwi, that you really really like their fanny pack.  'Fanny' to Kiwi's means 'vagina'...

You can tell how confused I was when I was getting crazy looks from the guy at the party and how embarrassed I was when I was corrected by an American that has been living in NZ for quite some time... I need to watch what I say...

Glass Door

By the title of this new post, I can bet you anything you know what bethism act most likely transpired...

Naturally, because of the earthquake, a lot of shops and stores had a lot of damage done to them.  I was at one of the malls one afternoon around the busy lunchtime hour.  I had finished what I needed to get inside and was headed back to the car park with my host family.  As I was passing by Border's, I noticed a lot of work being done on the inside.  I was extremely intrigued.  I continued walking as I watched worker fixing the glass, re-wiring different sections of the store, and pulling up carpet.  Amidst being so transfixed with the remodeling and cleaning up of Border's, I failed to really watch where I was walking.

My lack of attention to my walking path led me straight into a glass partition/door of the neighboring coffee shop where numerous people were out dining for lunch.  I am talking SMACK into the glass partition.  I had to almost catch myself.  I paused, realizing what had just happened, and I looked through the partition at the people staring at me.  Everyone, even those across the road, turned to look at me and started snickering.  I, of course, turned bright red and started walking super fast to catch up with my host family who were way in front of me. 

I need to pay way more attention when I am walking.

If This Ever Happens to Me, I will DIE.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Unicorns are Silly.

Sometimes, you just meet the most interesting people...

It's no mystery by now that I am awkward...

... I mean, why else would I have created this blog?

However, my life also highly demonstrates my potential of getting into awkward situations and meeting other awkward people in very interesting ways.  Here's more proof of this:

I ride the bus everyday to and from the office.  As I was waiting for my bus to arrive yesterday, this guy walked up the the stop and stood directly behind me.  Pretty weird in general, because anything behind you is a blind spot.  I kind of glanced around and then turned back to face the street again.  Another minute passed and he moved up right next to me.  "I wish there was at least one bloody cloud in the sky," he said without really looking at me.  I just did my awkward pity laugh that I do when I don't know anything else to say.  Then I remembered, oh yeah, Kiwis LOVE to talk about the weather (fact... they do... probably because it literally changes DRASTICALLY each day... not kidding)... so I decided to just keep talking about the weather.  About how hot it was on that particular day, how rainy it was the day before, and how I am glad I am not back in the States where Chicago seems to keep getting blasted with all the crazy snowstorms.  He started asking me all sorts of questions about America:  What are the people like, job opportunities, cities, the party scenes... etc... I then asked him where he was from, and at this point, this kid just starts RANTING and spilling his guts to me.  Telling me how much he didn't get along with his family, how he moves every couple of months just because he is bored, how he has no interest in finding a job because he has government benefit money to hold him over for awhile, and about the new flat he found for $110 a week.

At that moment, I was pretty excited when my bus showed up.  But as soon as I stood up, he stood up with me and continued talking, I realized that this must have been his bus as well.  Once I got on the bus, he kind of paused from talking.  No one was really on the bus - PLENTY of open seats around me - and he comes over to me and says, "This seat taken?" And sat right now next to me.  I thought to myself, 'Alright, just 15 more minutes and you're all good.'  Our conversation on the bus?  Him asking me, "OKAY, guess how old I am? I bet you can't get it right... Everyone thinks I am a lot younger than I look."  To me, this guy looked about 30, but going off of what he said, I replied, "Hmmm... 23? 24?"  He just starts laughing, "NO! I am 19!"  WHAT?! No way... maybe like 10 years ago... So I decided to test him as well since 'how old are you?' is one of the most common questions people ask me.  He thought I was 16.  Big surprise there.  Then he started talking about how he smokes and chews tobacco (hence one reason he might look so old) and then we started debating on why someone should or should not smoke.

I was extremely relieved when I saw my stop in the distance.  I asked him where he was headed (since my stop is one of the last few on the route) and he responded, "Oh, no where really... I have nothing really to do until my mate picks me back up at the mall later..." Soooooo he just decided to ride the bus with me because he was bored? Alrighttttttt kind of creepy, but whatever. Needless to say, I got off the bus rather quickly...

I found out his name was Ryan... so I may or may not be seeing him around... he DOES know my bus stop, so I wouldn't be surprised after THIS encounter...

Metro Mega Fall

Since I am too scared to drive on the left side of the street (and too cheap to get a car for 6 months), my choice of transportation is the Metro bus.  I have notice a DRASTIC difference between the public transportation system here in ChristChurch versus that of Omaha or even Chicago... It is SUPER nice.  Really really clean and almost everyone takes it.  It's pretty cool, actually.

So, I was on my way to work this morning, and it was my official first day of taking the bus all by myself so I could get used to the system.  I was really excited, because I got on my right line at the right time and I arrived at my stop.  NO PROBLEMS.  I was so proud.

Then came the matter of getting OFF the bus.  Rule here is:  People get off the bus first and then let everyone else at the stop on.  Well, I was toward the front of the bus so that basically meant I was the first one responsible for getting off.  I stand up, walk off... and TOTALLY underestimated how far the footpath (sidewalk) was from the bus... and ate it.  And of course, the bud stop was totally full of people trying to get on and a lot of people on the bus waiting to get off because it is a really popular stop.

Luckily, people in NZ are way nicer than people in the states and a couple people helped me up.  I brushed off and after thanking people, I walked quickly to the office.

Just because I am on the opposite side of the world doesn't mean that my awkwardness didn't follow me here...

Step 1: Be Aware of the Culture You Are In...

Making mistakes, especially in terms of social culture, are extremely common when you move to a foreign place... However, I think I underestimated how different American and Kiwi culture really is... you wouldn't think so, but by my example, you've been warned...

1. Within 10 minutes of landing in NZ, I already went to the wrong side of the car when trying to get into the front seat.  Even now, I still walk to the wrong side almost EVERY time.  All the staff at ReChurch are trying to convince me to learn to drive, but I am afraid I will kill someone.  If I can't even WALK to the ride side of the car, how am I supposed to drive (let alone TURN) on the correct side of the road. 

2.  I need to remember to first look right and then left when crossing the street.  Also, pedestrians DO NOT have the right-of-way unless they are at a designated cross walk.  Even in parking lots. With just these things in mind, I have almost died numerous times.

3.   I asked for sugar in my tea and coffee… which is apparently a very british thing to do... NOT KIWI.  I got weird looks and felt really self-conscious.  I will have to learn to like my tea and coffee with no sugar.  They have tea time here... A LOT.

4. Being fluent in English barely helps here.  With a combination of their slang and the accent and how fast they all speak, I can barely understand the things people are saying to me.  I find myself saying, "Pardon?" a WHOLE lot.

5. BBQ's here are VERY different than BBQ's in the States.  Yes, it is a time to hang out and grill, but these people love their food... like they eat 6 meals a day basically (shoot, my efforts to lose weight are NOT going to be fostered in this environment...).  When someone asks you to a BBQ at their house, do NOT assume that they have everything covered for you just because they don't TELL you to bring things to eat or share with the group.  EVERYONE brings their own food to BBQ's in NZ... the only thing the host provides for the guests are the drinks.  Thankfully, at my first BBQ, where I had to learn this lesson the hard way, someone gave me half of their grilled chicken so I had something to eat at dinner.  I will not make that mistake again.

6. I am taking public transportation while I am in NZ so I have been trying to learn the bus schedule.  Well, the first time I tried to take the bus, I missed it because I got the time wrong (details details).  Determined not to make this mistake again, I went early to the bus stop to await my bus.  When my bus approached, I walked to the curb... and my bus flew past me.  WHAT?! Well, apparently you have to wave down the bus in order for it to stop to pick you up.  Shoot.

7. They eat cheese, butter, and mayo on EVERYTHING.  I hate all three of those things.  The first sandwich my host mom made for me? Butter, cheese, and Ham.  I took the cheese off and gave it to my host brother but I ate the butter and ham.  I can definitely say from that experience, I will definitely be packing my own lunches.

8. 'The Hobbit' was holding auditions a week and a half before I arrived in ChristChurch.  Now, it was kind of a half serious, but long standing joke back in the states that I should totally try out for a part!  Well, I was going to try and tell this story to all my coworkers at ReChurch, but before I had the chance, one person looks at me and says, in front of the entire group, "Do you know you'd make the perfect hobbit?"  I am glad everyone is already getting an accurate impression of me.

9. People walk around barefoot all the time here.  It's my kind of place. However, it really grosses me out walking through the mall and seeing people with superrrrrrr dirty feet trying on the same shoes you were trying on.  Sorry, no thanks. I won't go that far.

10. Coffee here isn't just coffee.  There are millions of kinds.  I didn't know what kind to get, because looking at the vast array of choices on the menu caused me more stress than I liked, so I asked for just a large plain coffee... in NZ, no such thing... instead? "We have long black, short blacks, flat whites, and fluffies..." ....What?

Different cultures are so wonderful and I am so grateful to be getting this experience.  But culture shock is for sure hitting me in certain areas... WAY more than I anticipated coming to a country I figured would be pretty similar to the U.S.. Stick with me over the next six months... it's gonna be good.

30 hours.

Welcome to the first (of many I'm sure) "Bethisms: NZ Edition" blog post.  Going to a new country brings many interesting experiences... moving to one for six months can cause even MORE interesting (or in my case, awkward) experiences.  30 hours doesn't seem to be that long of time.  In fact, it's really not that long. However, for me, loads of Bethisms can occur... Here are the awkward moments I had in the first 30 hours of my departure to NZ:

1. Waiting to board my plane from Chicago to L.A.? I was on the phone with my sister Jackie, I started WEEPING, and the younger guy sitting next to me moved a couple of rows away.  Obviously crying made him very uncomfortable.  Then I ended up sitting next to him on the plane... seriously... what were the chances?! He did not make ANY type of conversation with me on the entire flight.

2. My flight to Aukland was LONG to say the least... and naturally, I would be sitted next to an extremely obnoxious couple.  THANKFULLY I was in an aisle seat so I could get up and move whenever I wanted (13 hours is a LONG flight), but still.  They were super touchy-feely (and I HATE PDA) and tickling each other the first 45 minutes of the flight.  The woman had the giggle of Fran Drescher meets Peter Griffin from 'Family Guy.'  They were also telling inside jokes over and over and OVER again... I finally got to the point that I decided to stop reading and put my head phones on.  The guy looked at me because I was pretty much blaring my music.  I looked back at him and clearly turned my iPod volume up even more.  I am normally not this sassy with strangers, but I could not stand it anymore.  Another annoying thing? Every time I had JUST fallen asleep, he decided he needed to get up and go to the bathroom.  I took his mint from his dinner plate... oops.

3.  Customs in Auckland... Well, first of all, carrying all my luggage without a cart/trolley was hilarious enough. Going through customs?  They made me open up my bags and they searched my shoes... mainly my rain boots.  "Have these been used or are they new?" "Um, they are used..." "We normally take boots like these away because they carry coil and seeds..." "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't think it would be a big deal.  They look pretty clean to me, though."  "Next time, it will be a $400 fine." "Oh, okay, thank you..."  Close one... good thing I look like I am 16 and probably made them feel bad for me. 

4. The bathrooms in NZ freak me out and confuse me.  First of all, the toilets are all like mini toilets... seriously, they are way smaller than American toilets... and, instead of just having a button to push to flush, the one's in the Auckland airport had four buttons.  It took me like one full minute to even figure out how to fully flush the toilet.  The huge line of women waiting waiting probably thought I was crazy.... especially since there was only one stall and there was NO way they didn't know it was me trying to figure it all out.

5. After I arrived in ChristChurch and were leaving the airport, I almost got hit by a car (look right and THEN left) and also walked to the wrong side of the car to get in the passenger seat.  My host family just laughed at me... at least they are getting a dose of my awkwardness from the get-go... there shouldn't be too many surprises from now on...

I will make sure to keep you updated with more and more Bethisms over the next six months! 

Kentucky Fried EVERYTHING.

I am in Louisville, Kentucky taking a class about cross-cultural missions in preparation for my internship in New Zealand... WHY they chose KENTUCKY as the location for this particular class is beyond me.  I know a couple people from back home and in Omaha who actually really like Kentucky... and before I came here, I just made fun of it based on stereotypes and just to make those people mad.  However, now that I am here I realize that... I WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG.

Here are some HILARIOUS things I have encountered while I have been in KY... some awkward, most just ridiculous and super stereotypical:

- I asked one guy, who is a native Kentuckian, about what his favorite food was.  His response? "Fried Chicken or anything from Cracker Barrel."  I thought he was kidding and was waiting for him to crack a big smile.  I was ready to laugh and say, "Wow, you are actually pretty cool for making fun of your state a little!" But none of that happened... he WASN'T kidding. Awesome.
- Kentucky accents are just horrendous.  Really, they are... I don't care what anyone says. Weird twang.
- I could see how it might be pretty in the summertime or fall when all the leave in the countryside are changing, but the cities are super hick and gross... like one strip mall I saw had Burger King, McDonald's, Wendy's, AND another burger joint... okay now, watch your cholesterol.
- Apparently, the number one killer of babies is child abuse... They probably feed them bbq ribs and fried chicken for every meal and their poor little bodies can't handle it.
- They drink sweet tea for almost every meal... at least the Kentuckians in my class do...
- I have heard too many "Oh My Lanta!"'s this week already and we are only on day three of five.  I might freak out the next time I hear it.
- I got chewed out for pronouncing the city wrong.  Okay people, don't spell 'Louisville' that way if it's not supposed to be pronounced that way.



I adore the class I am taking and love everything I am learning, but there is a reason why Louisville is a "well kept secret"... no one ACTUALLY wants to go there.

It's All Amanda's Fault...

I don't know what it is, but it seems that whenever I am around my sisters, especially Amanda, my awkwardness flares up more than normal... Take today for example:

- Amanda and I went to the mall to go to a really cute paper/stationary store. We were trying to find a parking space in the lot but were having no luck. I was getting frustrated with missing spots and dumb drivers. At one point, I was pulling out of one particular lot, and I was stopped because a big cement truck was stopped right in front of me and needed to back up. I made my frustration very obvious... and then I notice a construction worker staring at me. He gives me a hand gesture and look that basically says, "Okay girl, calm down. We'll out of your way in just a second." Once the cement truck moved, he looked me in the eye and gave me the motion to go. I am embarrassed my frustration was obviously noticed...

- Amanda, Elliot, and I went bowling. There were a bunch of people at the alley and both lanes next to us were occupied. I was getting confused about which bowling balls were ours or the couples' next to us. It was my turn to bowl, so I went up trying to pick out which ball was mine. As I was moving the different bowling balls around to get mine, the guy next to us came up trying to get to him and his girlfriend's bowling balls. I felt bad that I was in his way and moving around their stuff... so this apparently was my natural response, "Oh, I'm sorry for moving your balls around!..." He just looks at me and I could just feel the blood flood to my face. I need to just apologize and not say anything next time.

- Tripped pretty badly in front of a huge crowd of people as we were leaving a restaurant after dinner. Now I trip a lot, but I just hate doing it in front of huge crowds because then, after everyone sees me trip, I feel like they talk and laugh about it for the next five or ten minutes... plus recalling it later in the night for a few giggles.


I am normally not this awkward in one single day, so I am blaming Amanda's presence.