Cataracts

Story of the day:

So, since I am progressively taking over teaching duties in the classroom, my cooperating teacher thought it would be a good idea for me to start taking over her bus duties too... oh joy. Well, imagine me and my handy-dandy bud duty clipboard, walking through the hallways all bundled up and ready to conquer the mini blizzard outside, hoping that the buses would actually be able to take all these kids home. Well, I went to my assigned bus, and thank goodness, all the kids were there. One by one, I am checking their names off. One of my kindergarten students, Mariella, was sitting at the front of the bus right next to where I was taking attendance. She keeps looking at me all funny, so I look at her and just smile.

This is how the rest of the story/conversation went:

"Are you blind?" - Mariella

"Umm... what? No, I'm your art teacher and I am looking at you right now... I guess I don't understand." - Me

"Well... your eyes..." - Mariella

My guess is that because my eyes are light blue, she thought I had cataracts. She is Hispanic so she most likely has not spent too much personal time with people with light blue eyes...

Part of me wants to say thank you but another part of me is just genuinely confused... I've never been asked that before.

Huh... Welp, there's a first for everything...

Student Teaching Fiascos

Sorry I've been so bad about updating this blog! Student teaching has taken over my life... so I feel like I have very little time just to sit down and write about all my amazingly awkward events that inevitably present themselves in the two elementary schools I am at.

Here are some short stories to fill you in.

1. One of my special ed kids was playing with something in his hands while I was reading a book to their class. After I finished reading, he ran up to me and told me he had something to give me. He held out his hand, and I, mine. When I looked at my palm to see what he had left me, I see a tooth. He apparently just decided to pull it out during the story and was really proud to show it off. Or he thought I was the tooth fairy and he was expecting some money in return for his baby tooth.

2. Kids NONSTOP tell me how young I look or how short I am. How old are you? Really? You look like you're 16. How tall are you? My 14 year old brother is taller than you. Miss Cavender, why are you so short? It's not enough that I have been teased about my height my entire life, now I need to hear it from 6-12 year olds. Excellent.

3. I saw a kid poop on the floor of his classroom. And another one of my students got in trouble for pooping in a urinal. What is it with little boys (and I guess the male gender in general) and being WAY too open and proud of bodily functions and secretions? Stop it.

4. I am the "new teacher" in school... which according to the school staff means that little kids really like me... and little boys think I'm cute. A 6th grade boy stops by to visits me in my office everyday... and he gave me a plastic skull ring and a drawing of me that looked like a transvestite. Sorry, I am not very flattered that a 12 year old has a crush on me. All the teachers call me "Rookie" and make fun of me for being this semester's "new teacher"... Gosh dang.

5. I have written 6 referrals (basically these are bad reports that get sent to the principal and have to go home to get signed by parents if the student is acting out) and have made 2 kids cry. Oops....................... BAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

6. Kids seriously say some of the funniest things. Here are a few of my favorite quotes:

• (While making origami heart bracelets for Valentine's Day. One student, Cole, toward another student, Tiber, while they were working) "Hey Tiber... who's your Valentine?... You're MOM?!" My reaction? Uncontrollable laughter. Their facial expressions were priceless.
• "I have cramps..." - student Eliesha. "Dude, that's cause you're overweight." - student Trayvon "Trayvon, that was both incredibly rude and unnecessary!" - Me "No, it's okay Miss Cavender. I'm fat.... But at least I don't look like a donkey child."
• "WHAT THE F***?!" - Kindergartner Nytrelle
• "Miss Cavender, I think I'm going throw up..." - Derek, a first grade student with austism who fakes an illness EVERY class. "You look just fine to me, Derek."- Me "No, reallllllly, my stomach is going to fall outtttttt. (Screaming) I'M GONNA BARRRRFFFFF!" - Derek "... Derek, why are you shouting?" - Me "My stomach's mad so it's making my voice loud." - Derek
• "You smell like Peanut Butter, Miss Cavender... I likeeeeeee it." - student Aishya

Hopefully, I'll be more dedicated to updating this on a more regular basis.